Poisonous, Glamourous, Chess
by StarryVx
Summary: James is on a new assignment. A deadly African bussiness man is trading blood diamonds for Russian uranium. But why? I AM SO SORRY GUYS BUT THIS STORY IS ON HIATUS UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.
1. Is It Worth It?

He sat pensively in the old maroon chair that didn't match his conservative style lounge but fit in just right. He stared at the ugly disfigured cuts and marks that ran up his arm and across his shoulder. He wondered to himself. Was it worth it? Mutilated in Murmansk, tortured in Adelaide and almost getting killed in Calcutta, he winced, he had nothing on this earth, money and many, many beautiful women but nothing to make his mother proud if she lived. He was on the brink of deciding to resign when the shrill ring of his office phone cursed through the air. The little dark haired woman James employed as a cleaner and maid hurried into the office and answered with a thick Irish accent, James could tell by the slight change in the tone of her voice that it was his boss M. M was the very back bone of the SIS, she took no nonsense and was a very efficient assassin, she was queen in our establishment; and she knew it.

'It's M Mr Bond.'

'Thank you Grainne.'

'Hello?'

'Get down to HQ immediately.'

'Hello to you too M'

'No funny business Bond. It's urgent.'

'You know you love me'

To that James was greeted with the monotony of a dialling tone, he smiled this was how it was with him and M.

He burst into M's office chest forward he was the knight in this place, after the demise of the former 007, Michael Cormack in Calcutta.

'You wanted to see me?'

'You know Rra Badule, founder and owner of Badule Enterprise? We have reason to believe he is trading blood diamonds in Sierra Leone for Russian Uranium.'

'Anton Nikolaevsky?'

M smiled and nodded. We'd seen him before a really disgusting little thing, does everything from selling drugs to children to owning numerous brothels; we've brought him down before but haven't put him away yet. One seems to have VERY powerful girlfriends, second he's the nephew of the current prime minister.

'We need you to go to Sierra Leone and find out what Badule is using the uranium for and report back'

'Yes M'

'And James'

He turned to stare at M she never referred to him by his name.

'Do not try to take Badule's guards, he has extensive machinery and he is well within the law to shoot you for trespassing.'

He nodded and turned to the door, preparing himself for the mental abuse coming when he viewed the awful, generic hotel Miss Money-Penny always picked when M cleared her throat.

'Yes?' James asked, slightly irritated at this point.

'You can't believe I'm sending you alone?!'


	2. Akua

M asked in disbelief. 'Much too dangerous' she thought mostly to herself.

James flinched slightly at the mention of an assistant the first and last time he had an assistant or rather accompanied someone on a mission was on the Calcutta Mini Genocide trip, which had resulted in the death of Cormack… A stunning woman about the age of 18 slid through the padded double doors behind M's office, the doors no one goes into or comes out of. Her coffee coloured skin caught the light in the right places, her chin length hair swayed as she walked looking tantalizingly soft and shiny. She looked like she belonged on a fashion run way along with the rest of the beautiful air-heads in the world; surely she can't be_ my_ assistant James thought. She's not an assistant, she's a protégée.

'You've got to be kidding me!' James exclaimed.

The beautiful girl, who had stopped at M's desk and perched herself on top of it, had turned to stare at James. He didn't like it, it made him self-conscious; a rarity. He was a good looking man with russet coloured hair and piercing blue eyes which seemed to look into your soul, but he worried all the same. He continued to fidget until M motioned for him to come forward and there she whispered.

'Don't be childish, don't let appearances deceive you.' In a louder tone she continued 'This is Akua, 24, military extraordinaire, trained by the CIA tested by Russian SMERK, schooled at Eaton, and she was personally trained in combat by Thomas Lithely, the world renowned assassin.' She said the name with reverence, James knew Mr. Lithely by reputation only. He was the gunman behind the bullet that killed John F. Kennedy; the SIS kept this from the Americans in exchange for a one to one warfare lesson which M secured for Cormack of course. 'You require her knowledge in African etiquette, she's better than you James'

James scoffed, highly doubting this until Akua edged over to him, putting out her hand.

'Akua' she stated simply in what was clearly an oxford accent. James reached out to take her hand but ended up on his back on M's laminate floor quite suddenly. The room was very still for an immeasurable moment of time, followed by M's signature chuckle. Akua had done this to him? But she was so small. James got up and brushed himself down. He was crumpled and extremely embarrassed.

'I'm sorry about that I …' Akua started

'Don't worry about it' James said gruffly then turned to M and said 'I thought we were on a tight schedule?'

'Right get going then' M said, and James smiled this was she said whenever anyone went on a mission and he and only he knew that what she actually meant was 'Bye, be safe and careful and don't die'

Akua looked she was stifling giggles which angered James no end and caused him to behave discourteously towards her in the few minutes it took to get to Miss Money-Penny's office.


	3. SSSalt N Pepa

Hi Readers, reviewers and People who just stumbled upon this fic, so sorry for the delay real life got on top of me I can promise to try and update twice a week. Loads of Love Vonique

Disclaimer: James Bond is hot James Bond is sexy but lovely James Bond doesn't belong to me (unfortunately) x

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"Come in." Came the cool collected voice of Ms. Money-Penny.

James smiled. Ah! Normalcy, if there was one thing he could count on it was the generic features of the hotel Ms. Money-Penny chose for his missions. His grin was well settled when he grasped the door knob and entered her office.

"James." She greeted "Due to a request from Akua, you will be staying at the L'hotel de Charles de Gaules on the coast of Marseille. Your new identities are Jimmy and Veronica Brown. James you are an estate agent from East London, 33. Your marriage to Veronica enabled to get British Citizenship. Akua you are a Sierra Leone native, 28 , unemployed, been living in England for 6 months."

The information hit James in a rush, no standard hotel?, Married? To her?

"No."

Ms Money Penny turned from her computer screen to stare at James.

"I beg your pardon."

James dithered, Ms Money Penny was not an agent, but was just as much a force to be reckoned with.

She cleared her throat as if to say I thought so, raised herself to her full height., stepped from behind her desk and proceeded to walk from the room in the direction James knew was Gregg McKinnon's workshop. The echoing tap of her shoes stopped just out of McKinnon's room.

"This is where you will get your physical aides. At 3pm Jonathan will be waiting to take you to the airport everything you need is already packed and has been deposited into the car. Good day James, Akua."

She then walked away along the narrow cold corridor to his left. Akua eagerly opened the door to McKinnon's workshop, where a wave of sound hit them.

"S-S-Salt N Pepa's here.... ahhhh push it... push it real good." The slightky off key male voice called. There McKinnon was, his slightly greasy mousy hair sticking to his damp forehead. His glassy grey eyes spaced, his mouth comically following the words to Salt N Pepa.

Akua let out a throaty laugh, a deep amusing sound from deep in her diaphragm. She could no longer hold herself up and continued to laugh doubled over, snorts forming here and there, a slight dribble at the side of her lip, eyes closed tight in mirth. James should have been disgusted at such unladylike behaviour, he wanted to be but he found it quite soothing, he'd been around too many girls who hid their true behaviour to seem more appealing. _Wait _ he thought _I hate her I mustn't think about her like a person competition that's all she is a girl trying to steal my position, well I am the knight and for that title I'll fight to the death._

James sneered at Akua and advanced to poke McKinnon out of his stupor.

"Hey, what?" McKinnon started, and then noticed James. "Oh huh, I just um... well see... um the weaponry, er just follow me." McKinnon snuffled.

A red haze descended on James. He decided to show Akua what would happen if she tried to upstart his position he was going to show her what happens when pawns try to play with knights.

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